Everything's Amazing and Nobody's Happy

I don’t know if you guys have seen this clip before, but if you haven’t - check it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r1CZTLk-Gk

I decided today that I should watch this about once a week just to keep things in perspective. How many times do I sit at my computer and get completely unnecessarily angry because a website takes “too long” to load? Just this morning I found myself seriously frustrated because the formatting on some lab reports I had written hasn’t been working. Formatting. Really, Nicole? That’s what’s gonna get you fired up? How many thousands of injustices are there happening in the world right now? And with all that going on I’m just gonna sit here in my warm house after having eaten a warm filling breakfast and get pissed off about formatting. On my macbook, nonetheless. Ugh.

This is why I think simplicity is so important. I am constantly (obviously with the exception of this morning...oh wait...and lots of other times) trying to focus on appreciating the little things in life, and keeping things in my life little.

I’m really into Mumford and Sons right now, and they have a song called Awake My Soul that is great. One line in particular says:

“In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die.
Where you invest your love, there you invest your life.”

I like the perspective that lines gives. First of all, we are all just here, chillin in our bodies - living and then dying. That’s pretty much what it comes down to. And in between that - we love, and we live. I have been reflecting recently, after a conversation with my friend Megan, about just how important love is. How is it so easy for me to forget this? To get caught up in life: studying, chemistry, joining a lab group, figuring out life in a new city, on a new side of the country, missing old friends, working too hard, not resting enough, stressing about things that are not worth the brain cells, finding something or another to complain about instead of just being CONTENT with where I am and focusing on LOVING those around me.

Again and again I find myself coming back to this. I want to invest my life: time, energy, emotions, into loving people instead of into getting upset about formatting. Though formatting is annoying, as it is when the T is late, or planes are delayed, or something we’ve come to depend on just isn’t working for us, I’m gonna keep working on making my life not about ME and what is or isn’t convenient for me, but about OTHERS. About how a smile can make their day a little brighter, or a hug might be just what someone needs if I slow down for a second to notice.

Peace, love, and grace to you friends.

Suddenly Living in Boston

4 October 2010

Time. Truly what a fickle thing it is. One minute I’m watching the sun set over the ocean at Point Loma - enjoying senior year, surrounded by people I have come to love and cherish deeply...the next minute I’m walking the narrow cobblestone streets of Roma, passing by the Colosseum, experiencing history like never before. Then, without a moments notice I’m back home in Colorado, sitting at my kitchen table, laughing with my parents, making ridiculous videos with my little sister, hiking Pike’s Peak and breathing in every moment of mountain air I can. But don’t get too settled there, because now its off to Boston, and before I know it I’ve been living in Boston for over 6 weeks and I’m sitting in a Starbucks in Davis Square, enjoying a Pumpkin Spice latte and studying for my first graduate school midterm. [Correction: currently enjoying a pumpkin spice latte as I write a blog post to procrastinate studying for my first graduate school midterm...some things never change. :)]

Walking through the halls of the Pearson Chemistry building at Tufts today, I could barely believe it happened so fast. Everything about preparing for grad school seemed like SUCH a big deal...all the countless hours spent studying for the GRE, researching schools, sending in application after application, visiting schools, waiting for acceptance letters, sifting through the rejection letters to survey the options, finally making the decision, moving across the country, moving in, meeting other first years in the department, starting classes...and then all of a sudden, here I am. I’m doing it. This is just life now. The whirlwind is finally slowing down as new rhythms take its place. No longer am I planning and preparing for some big changes coming, now I’m living them. The preparation has been actualized into this new daily life of mine. And I like it. It’s different, and really hard in some ways to adjust to, but its good. And I’m thankful. I’m thankful for all the work I did, and the support of people walking with me along the way. Parts of me still REALLY wants to be in San Diego, with my roommates and friends who stayed there, but I’m working on living in the moment, and really “being” where I am. Which is in Somerville, Massachusetts. For the next 5 years (at least). So let’s do this, Boston. Let’s become friends. I’m ready if you are. :)

Pike's Peak

All alone.
Yet surrounded by such vivid life.
Silent.
Yet listening to the waking sounds of morning.
Cold.
Yet warmed by the rising sun.
In pain.
Yet cozily sitting in my sweats.
Content.
I could not be more thrilled to be sitting here.

Early morning, sun just risen.
Birds chirping, chipmunks scampering.
Well rested, according to camping standards.
Another six mile hike looms in my future -
Waiting to suffer my legs, back, feet, and shoulders.
Mosquitoes search me endlessly,
Seeking some exposed skin to feast upon.

I love the mountains
The wind blowing through the trees
The birds chatting back and forth
The feel of the strong rock behind my back
The smell of pine, of earth, of nature.

Life is simple out here -
No shopping malls,
No excessive wealth,
No arguments about petty things,
Just life. Shalom.
Oneness with nature.
I was made for this. And this for me.
My God lives here, dwells here.

I am grateful to see, to hear, to feel
To taste the beauty of this moment.
This - I will remember,
Take with me as I travel onwards -
Just waiting until the day I come back,
And summit this majestic mountain once again.

A Journey Through The Senses

It's strange to think
Of where've I've been and what I've seen.
Tall buildings, big cities,
Cultures different from my own.
History, Modernity,
Foreign languages galore.

I've feasted my eyes
On sites straight from postcards.
History books come alive
With much new meaning and grandeur.

Ancient buildings,

Huge cathedrals, local shops and markets.

So many paintings -

Art that will take your breath away.

Rivers and bridges,
Quaint towns and tourist centers.

And I have tasted
What brings these people life.
Whether in restaurants,
Grocery stores, or someone's home,
I have been humbled
By heart-felt service and exquisite tastes.
Paella and sausages
One from Spain and the other in Germany.
Gelato, wine,
And the best pizzas in Italy.
Home-cooked specialties
Baked with excitement, and a joy to share.

These too I have smelled
My mind storing and memorizing the scents.
Freshly baked bread,
Waffle cones, and meat sizzling on the grill.
Country and city smells,
Cows, rivers, fields, and forests.
An old manor house,
A used book, or a fresh garden.
Air thick with pollution,
Hot dusty roads, and cool summer rain.

And now we listen -
To everything from roosters to children laughing.
Honking horns, tires screeching,
People talking, cheering, yelling, and crying.
American pop music
Playing in clubs and restaurants alike.
Pushy street vendors
Selling knock off purses, sunglasses, or laser pointers.
So many languages
With unique accents, dialects, and sayings.

And lastly comes touch
As we journey through the lands of Europe

I've held train tickets,

Bus passes, metro cards, and flight confirmations.

Maps and a camera -

Fitting into the tourist stereotype.

Shaking hands, giving hugs

Meeting new friends and reuniting with old ones.

Blisters from garden tools,
A hot mug of tea, soft blanket, and a book.
My feet have stepped
On ground once walked by Romans.

And now I've returned -
Sitting on my back porch in Colorado.
Birds chirping happily,
The sun just peaking up through the trees.
With tea in hand,
A piece of toast, and my journal.
Ready for new adventures -
A continuing exploration, a never-ending journey.

Sitting in postcards...

So quite the ride its been since I was on here last...spent a week in Barcelona, two and a half days in Roma, and then just finished day 1 in Firenze. Oi Vay. I am insanely tired and fighting a cold. But shoot, I am lovin it.

Some random thoughts...

My favorite food thus far: For sure the Paella in Barcelona, Yummy!
Favorite language to listen to: Italian. Oh man, it is beautiful.
Favorite accent to hear people fight in: British...they sound so stinkin polite its hard to believe they are really fighting.
Favorite language to attempt to speak: Spanish...wasnt as embarrassingly awful as I thought it would be.
Favorite language to actually speak: German...though I am waiting till Germany to really indulge this one.

Fun quotes:

From a guy selling laser pointers pointing them at people in obscene places: "Shaka Laka Boom Boom, you see? Yes, you like, shaka laka boom boom!"

Ashley today sitting on a bridge wall eating gelato in Florence: "I feel like I'm sitting in a postcard."

Guilia and I in the hostel: "Oh my goooaaaahhhhd! Router, netflicks, whaaaaat?"

"The whole object of traveling is not to set your foot on foreign land, it is to at last set foot on one's own country as a foreign land." - G.K. Chesterton...from the wall of our hostel.

Ok internet time is almost up but take care and hope to hear from you soon!

Ciao!

Life at L'Abri

Hello friends -

It's been a while since I've been blogging about an adventure but here we go...

I have been living essentially in Paradise for the last two weeks, at a lovely place called L'Abri in Greatham, England. (Oh, and I spent a few days exploring London but we can talk about that later :))

So at L'Abri we basically work for half the day and study for half the day. We eat breakfast and dinner all together, but split up for lunch to have discussions. This means we sit down at lunch and someone just asks a question, any question they have been thinking about, and we talk through it for an hour or so. Nights involve lectures, movies, visits to the pub, and other a sundry activities. Basically its been a huge blessing to be in this community where I feel both encouraged, supported, and challenged. People are real here. Really broken, really confused, really helpful, really sincere, really fun, really adventurous, really loving, really hard-working, really kind, and really just awesome.

I was talking with a friend the other day when she asked me what I had done during my study time that morning, what book I had read or what lecture I had listened to. My response was just that I had thought. I just sat outside in this beautiful English countryside and thought about life and things for a few hours. She laughed. What a wonderful place to be where we have time to do that. It has been so great to have no obligations to worry about, no where to be but here. It's really tough at times, no doubt, because I feel I have been smacked head on with some issues I've been hiding under the rug for a while. But I am thankful. And learning to be more so.

Yesterday morning I went on a run through this beautiful countryside and was absolutely awestruck with creation. God really did some good work there, didnt he? It's one thing to acknowledge with my mouth that yes, he's our Creator, and quite another to realize he painted the scene as I run between 20 horses on a footpath watching little bunnies flit across the path in front of me as the birds chirp in the trees and the morning mist hits my face as the sun peeks up through the trees and warms my skin. Definitely a humbling and joyous experience.

There are so many more stories to tell..obviously they must be saved for a later date. But to highlight a few - on our first day off we took a 4 hour walk to the No Name Pub through the countryside. And by countryside I literally mean through people's fields...the rule here is if you buy a piece of land that has a footpath on it you have to maintain it and let people go through your fields...this leads to one of the more enjoyable walk/hikes ever...and I can't begin to describe the wonderful conversations that happen along the way. Another wonderful journey was to a pub one night after dinner - there was a beer festival there and a live band and we basically danced like fools up in the front, along with so many wonderful people from the town. SO FUN. If you know me well at all, you know there is nothing I love more than a good dance party. And this was it - England-style. :)

Well I'm off to go to high tea, but take care, and I miss you all. On Wednesday Stef and I leave for Barcelona, and various adventures after that.

Oh, and yes we watched the England-USA game last night, and are thankful for a draw because now we can all continue getting along well...no unnecessary tension in the air. :)

Shalom to you all.

Reflections A Year Later

So I wrote this for BestSemester but thought I would put it up here as well...it just represents a little summary of where I feel I am at right now. It makes it seem like I have more figured out than I really do...this is just alot of what I have been processing for the last year.

"Here is a glimpse of some of what I learned while living in Mukono, Uganda. And I say “living” instead of “studying abroad” because it was living; it became home. I have a family, a home, a community in Uganda just as real to me as the chair I’m sitting in right now.

I learned that our cultures shape who we are. Our cultures create a picture of where we come from and what we are about. They also can create stereotypes and walls that divide us. My culture is not perfect, yet there are aspects I appreciate – my freedoms and the opportunities it has given me. There are also aspects that frustrate me and spur me to change – our consumerist way of life, our belief that we have a “right” to live with such excessive wealth. We are so distanced (and I do not mean geographically) from the suffering of this world that we live prosperous, comfortable lives with not a moment’s thought for the hardships others endure.

I learned that I can love people, and make an impact on their lives without being a full-time missionary. While in Uganda I was motivated to return to the US to pursue my doctoral degree in environmental chemistry so that when I go back to Uganda I will have valuable skills to offer, in addition to my heart for the people there.

I discovered that it is completely possible to take a shower with less than a gallon of water. I also learned that it is only too easy to come back to the US and take a hot shower for 15 minutes without thinking twice about how privileged I am to have that, or how much water that uses.

I have learned what it means to ask questions, and never find the answers.

I realized that in the US we are constantly bombarded with media. Everywhere we go there are TVs, radios, advertisements, and people telling us what we should buy and how we should dress to be socially acceptable. It’s too easy to go through the day without stopping to think or to be still before the Lord. I have learned that moments like the ones I spent sitting out on the back porch at my host family’s house can exist here even amidst the craziness of college life. I have learned that turning off the TV, closing ITunes, and creating those quiet moments is essential for maintaining the perspective and lifestyle I want to live.

I am continuing to learn to run my schedule based on the people I’m with rather than by the clock on the wall.

I learned that I love sitting for hours and drinking tea with people, and that the people in my life are more important and more worthy of my time and energy than anything else.

I learned that there are more ways to live out a belief in God than what I have grown up seeing in the US. Ugandan Christians painted a beautiful picture for me of what it looks like to live faithfully and be obedient to God. Their picture is very different from the one my parents drew and I am learning now to paint my own, drawing from what I have seen and experienced. I have a new canvas, and each day I paint a new line, color in something I was not sure of before, or scratch something out that doesn’t fit anymore."